PDA

View Full Version : To catch a cheater....



Boostd4
03-13-2007, 07:48 AM
Ok boys (and possibly girls)...I've got an interesting situation for you. I know there are some creative people on this board...and quite honestly some evil ones :shock:. But I've got a situation with my current GF that I was hoping you all would offer up some suggestions for.

I've been seeing this girl for 2 years (as of a few days ago in fact) and we had a "break" for about a month back in Sept. of last year. It really wasn't much of a break because we were still seeing each other regularly...but I digress. So during this "break" she went to Vegas for a wedding and met one of the wedding attendees and apparently hit it off. I didn't see this as a problem as we supposedly fixed things and we were moving on.

A few days after we patched things up, I get this long message through myspace about how she was super desperate to get back together with me and how she was planning to get knocked up to stay with me. It came from an anonymous profile that hasn't been active since last year. I pretty much bushed it off as BS and moved on.

Fast forward to this morning. I get an extremely long email from an address I've never seen. The subject line reads " **** is cheating". Basically the email has a string of copied emails (I'm assuming from ****'s account) detailing the back and forth between my GF and this guy she met. They are talking about phone conversations and text messages they have had and the dates on the emails lead up until last night (Mar. 12). There are several points in the emails in which she expresses her desire to fly out and see him, he lives in AZ. It's pretty obvious she shared secrets with the wrong people.

Now, here is an interesting twist...apparently he is in Iraq training police officers for the next year. But, he has leave to come home from time to time. In her very last email last night she expressed to him that she'd like to see him when he comes home...riiiight.


So my friends...I am left with no other alternative than to obviously confront her about it and basically end things. I have zero tolerance for this type of stuff and I'll never be able to trust her again.

My question to you is...what can I do to make myself feel better about doing this. I don't want to be over the top evil...but I want her to know she f'ed up.

sulpe
03-13-2007, 08:17 AM
That sucks. I say just drop her a$$ and just let it go at that. Be the better person and just walk away she will eventually realize that she lost something good. You'll find a better girl before you know it.

kimmievo
03-13-2007, 08:29 AM
I understand the question you are asking. I too had a similar situation about 6 years ago. My bf at the time started cheating on me with a girl at his work, and I had to figure out a way to let him know that I knew what he was doing, without being too vindictive about it. My dad is a PI, so I guess I have it in my blood, but I did a little investigative work and caught him in Monterey at the hotel room with the girl. Threw him for a total curve ball when I knocked on the door.
Anyways, since you already know what's going on, I suggest just sitting down and letting her know that you know, that you have proof, tell her how you are feeling and that she can have him. Be calm, be the bigger person (you already are because of your fidelity) and be in control of the conversation. Once there is all that needs to be said, just walk away. You'll feel much better doing it this way, rather than getting into a huge yelling match and calling each other names.

kimmievo
03-13-2007, 08:31 AM
Oh yeah, and good luck! Let us know what happens once you confront her.
You deserve to be with someone that only wants to be with you. And remeber, this isn't your fault. She's the one with the problem. I'm a big believer in Karma, so she will get what's coming to her.

RgistRdShowoffIX
03-13-2007, 08:47 AM
^ +1

She's already acted very immature so be the better person and be mature. This'll make her feel low and don't take sorry cus she prolly sorry she was caught.

Sorry, man. This situation sucks. :?

mtsevovii
03-13-2007, 09:01 AM
good: im sorry to hear what has happened. :( best of luck getting things fixed. hopefully leaving her is the main option you can accept.

evil: make sure she gets knocked up, and when she tells you shes pregnant, you say you want to leave her. then she'll cry about you leaving her and the kid. then you can get a dna test and slam in her face that the kid isnt yours and that she's been cheating. (slightly different from the other story about the guy with the vasectomy)

hellz Evo
03-13-2007, 09:02 AM
There is no point in lowering yourself to a level that you will later regret. Forward her the emails and ask her to pick up her stuff, if there is any there. I have had the exact same experience, I just picked up my stuff while she was at work, printed out what I had found and took off. It is not worth your time , energy or a possible compromise of your integrity to confront a person too scared to speak the truth.
I am sorry for your troubles but men have few choices and they are usually hard ones.

Sammy

awdaddict
03-13-2007, 09:22 AM
Do it with a normal heart.
That means, don't be angry, don't be sad.
Be like the calm water... and afterward don't think about it.
Don't think whether you could of done something better or something along that line.
When it's done, it's done.

bdking57
03-13-2007, 09:37 AM
Just say good bye to her my friend.. its the only way. Thats a hard position, but this situation is a major slap in your face. Considering all is true, your never going to trust this girl in the future, and you will end up not being yourself slipping into a controlling nature... it will end anyway once this sort of mis trust is present.

You have an advantage in that you have the facts in front of you so like suggested above, show no emotion..

Boostd4
03-13-2007, 09:51 AM
Thanks for the input everyone...I'm basically going to handle this as calmly as possible.

My strategy is to not even mention the emails...but just his name...and I'll let her dig the hole herself.

PANGES
03-13-2007, 10:50 AM
Thanks for the input everyone...I'm basically going to handle this as calmly as possible.

My strategy is to not even mention the emails...but just his name...and I'll let her dig the hole herself.


That's a good plan. If she plays it off, you can use some of the info from the emails and just slowly drop hints that you know. What someone said above is true. If something like this happens and you forgive her, it's going to change you and turn the relationship into a controlling one (speaking from personal experience). It was rediculous how I ended up. And when I realized it, I ended up ending it anyways. So I just wasted my time.

nebolic
03-13-2007, 12:52 PM
if you want revenge...

if she has a sister, I'd tap that shiznit

If she has a best friend, I'd tap that ass too.

if she has both, even better, I'd tap both her sister's ass and her best friend.

nebo

sulpe
03-13-2007, 12:58 PM
...all at the same time. If the guy has a sis tap that too.


Nebo, you're bad.

Limeyboy
03-13-2007, 01:02 PM
I would confront her about it. You got to rememeber, these are anonymous emails - it could be someone shit stirring or even someone who wants your girl from you playing you.

Just ask her about it. Its not you "acucsing"her as you got these emails out of the blue. You should be able to judge from her reacions if she has any knowledge about it or not.

Deep down you should already know the answers to this.

Boostd4
03-13-2007, 01:14 PM
if you want revenge...

if she has a sister, I'd tap that shiznit

If she has a best friend, I'd tap that ass too.

if she has both, even better, I'd tap both her sister's ass and her best friend.

nebo



Nebo my brother...you're my hero lol!

Boostd4
03-13-2007, 01:16 PM
I would confront her about it. You got to rememeber, these are anonymous emails - it could be someone shit stirring or even someone who wants your girl from you playing you.

Just ask her about it. Its not you "acucsing"her as you got these emails out of the blue. You should be able to judge from her reacions if she has any knowledge about it or not.

Deep down you should already know the answers to this.


Yeah, this is how I'm going to approach it. She does have a few friends that would kill to have a man.

But...I'll follow the legal creedo of "Innocent until the fool proves themselves guilty."

craziazzmofo66
03-13-2007, 01:35 PM
I would confront her about it. You got to rememeber, these are anonymous emails - it could be someone shit stirring or even someone who wants your girl from you playing you.

Just ask her about it. Its not you "acucsing"her as you got these emails out of the blue. You should be able to judge from her reacions if she has any knowledge about it or not.

Deep down you should already know the answers to this.



yea, seeing how these emails r anonymous. u dont know how creditable they r, i say u either do what limeyboy saids or do some investagatin on whos sendin those emails to u. keep an eye out for people around u and her, think of who might wanna inform u so that ud break up with her. or if they r just lettin u know. then if it comes down to it maybe u can try to track down the I.P. address of where the mails r commin from. then once u know the info is creditable, drop the ball.

Boostd4
03-13-2007, 01:53 PM
I would confront her about it. You got to rememeber, these are anonymous emails - it could be someone shit stirring or even someone who wants your girl from you playing you.

Just ask her about it. Its not you "acucsing"her as you got these emails out of the blue. You should be able to judge from her reacions if she has any knowledge about it or not.

Deep down you should already know the answers to this.



yea, seeing how these emails r anonymous. u dont know how creditable they r, i say u either do what limeyboy saids or do some investagatin on whos sendin those emails to u. keep an eye out for people around u and her, think of who might wanna inform u so that ud break up with her. or if they r just lettin u know. then if it comes down to it maybe u can try to track down the I.P. address of where the mails r commin from. then once u know the info is creditable, drop the ball.


I agree, but I'm not sure you can track a Yahoo address can you? I can understand if it was an ISP or a direct email account.

craziazzmofo66
03-13-2007, 01:58 PM
I would confront her about it. You got to rememeber, these are anonymous emails - it could be someone shit stirring or even someone who wants your girl from you playing you.

Just ask her about it. Its not you "acucsing"her as you got these emails out of the blue. You should be able to judge from her reacions if she has any knowledge about it or not.

Deep down you should already know the answers to this.



yea, seeing how these emails r anonymous. u dont know how creditable they r, i say u either do what limeyboy saids or do some investagatin on whos sendin those emails to u. keep an eye out for people around u and her, think of who might wanna inform u so that ud break up with her. or if they r just lettin u know. then if it comes down to it maybe u can try to track down the I.P. address of where the mails r commin from. then once u know the info is creditable, drop the ball.


I agree, but I'm not sure you can track a Yahoo address can you? I can understand if it was an ISP or a direct email account.



idk........im only commin up with the idea...kinda like a script writer, just because i can think of it, doesnt mean i know anything about it...lol

RunEvo
03-15-2007, 09:43 AM
Why don't you try checking her act by yourself? You can't just base everything on a random e-mail. If she is actually cheating on you, I would move on. Even if you stay with her, you will always have the doubt in a relationship as long as you are with her.

Hot8Evo
03-15-2007, 09:53 AM
I didnt read everyones feedback but, if you ask me i will just move forwward and get over it.. Just like you said you dont want to deal with her so, why waste time and get some headache.. GET RID OF HER and move on... If you guys live together and your paying for the bills tell her to get the hell out in your place... what i can picture is she messed up and you dont deserve to be treated like that so,no sympathy for her...

You dont even have to stress out because you have friends to tell you what shes been doing behind your back and shes the bitch one not you..

Go to Lemans on march 24th and and have some fun and you never know you might meet some fine girls.. I know missred,bricel,madevo,ohsnapitsjay are single and they are looking also... lol..

Dont have to worry about anything bro, just move on and thats the best bet we can give you... There is no time to waste for a girl like that....

cmydust
03-15-2007, 10:17 AM
Here's what I would do. First, find out if the emails are true. IE: reply back to the anonymous person who sent you the emails saying that you dont believe the emails and that you must see them together to believe it. Ask them to find out what date this guy is coming back from Irag and when your girl and this guy is meeting. Then take a day off of work to following your girl to confirm if the email is true or not.

If it was true, I'd do the following:

1. Do not tell her anything. Go on as everything was normal.
2. Tap her sister(s).
3. Tap her closest friends.
4. Still continue to tap her.
5. Then when you get tired of her..let her go without giving her an answer. That way she is left thinking "WTF just happened me."

PS...I'd probably tap her mom too if she is a MILF.

hot8evosgirl
03-16-2007, 06:43 AM
Ok boys (and possibly girls)...I've got an interesting situation for you. I know there are some creative people on this board...and quite honestly some evil ones :shock:. But I've got a situation with my current GF that I was hoping you all would offer up some suggestions for.

I've been seeing this girl for 2 years (as of a few days ago in fact) and we had a "break" for about a month back in Sept. of last year. It really wasn't much of a break because we were still seeing each other regularly...but I digress. So during this "break" she went to Vegas for a wedding and met one of the wedding attendees and apparently hit it off. I didn't see this as a problem as we supposedly fixed things and we were moving on.

A few days after we patched things up, I get this long message through myspace about how she was super desperate to get back together with me and how she was planning to get knocked up to stay with me. It came from an anonymous profile that hasn't been active since last year. I pretty much bushed it off as BS and moved on.

Fast forward to this morning. I get an extremely long email from an address I've never seen. The subject line reads " **** is cheating". Basically the email has a string of copied emails (I'm assuming from ****'s account) detailing the back and forth between my GF and this guy she met. They are talking about phone conversations and text messages they have had and the dates on the emails lead up until last night (Mar. 12). There are several points in the emails in which she expresses her desire to fly out and see him, he lives in AZ. It's pretty obvious she shared secrets with the wrong people.

Now, here is an interesting twist...apparently he is in Iraq training police officers for the next year. But, he has leave to come home from time to time. In her very last email last night she expressed to him that she'd like to see him when he comes home...riiiight.


So my friends...I am left with no other alternative than to obviously confront her about it and basically end things. I have zero tolerance for this type of stuff and I'll never be able to trust her again.

My question to you is...what can I do to make myself feel better about doing this. I don't want to be over the top evil...but I want her to know she f'ed up.




you don't need to let her know cuz she already knew it from the moment she was keeping that secret from you that she f'cked up.........and since you already dropped her....the only way to make yourself feel better....is to drink some shots of hennessy and sleep it off..wake up in the morning take a good long steamy shower.....dust yourself off and try again with someone worth your time.....it worked for me... just make sure it won't be a rebound though.....8)

PANGES
03-16-2007, 09:19 AM
^^^ Drinking alone = boo. We can have a NCE bar meet :)

MR_06
03-16-2007, 09:27 AM
^^^ Drinking alone = boo. We can have a NCE bar meet :)


Drinking alone isnt too bad. i've gone to the bar myself a few times, but i guess its not the same since i know half the ppl there plus all the bartenders/owner

but +1 for the NCE bar meet

Pure EvoIX
03-16-2007, 10:25 AM
just a little tip, make sure your car is out of sight when you break the news to her.

PANGES
03-16-2007, 11:01 AM
just a little tip, make sure your car is out of sight when you break the news to her.


+1.

06IXMR
03-16-2007, 05:25 PM
I would just punch her in the back of the head and knock her out, if she asks you what happened...tell her she just got dicked slapped by the devistator!

If thats too much,

Just sleep with her and when she falls asleep, hit her in the face with your balls and yell out " HEAD SHOT! "


Again, I am sorry that this has happened. It really does suck but, at least you found out and ended it before it got worse.





This is to make you laugh, really.


Just give her a ride and drop her off some where hella far like I did to the DMV instructor when he failed me.

JDMgrafiteMR
03-16-2007, 05:47 PM
lol^^^ dude if she played you then she dont respect you. If she dont respect you then you have no business staying w/ her. its over. No need to stress over it.

look at the silver lining, no gf means more mod money =)

im down for the nce bar meet and a nce strip club meet =)

MR_06
03-17-2007, 03:00 AM
lol^^^ dude if she played you then she dont respect you. If she dont respect you then you have no business staying w/ her. its over. No need to stress over it.

look at the silver lining, no gf means more mod money =)

im down for the nce bar meet and a nce strip club meet =)


bar/strip club meets sounds good. since the Eastbay guys supposed to do it several months back but postponed last minute :( even though i wasnt goin, but im single now. so lets party :lol:;)

hot8evosgirl
03-17-2007, 07:26 PM
just a little tip, make sure your car is out of sight when you break the news to her.


you're smart....how did u know?

hot8evosgirl
03-17-2007, 07:28 PM
^^^ Drinking alone = boo. We can have a NCE bar meet :)


no...of course you gonna drink with group of friends (mostly girls if you're a guy and mostly guys when you're a girl..woot woot) so they can all carry you out of the club and drive you home or do whatever with you (hehe) when you pass out in the club...again..it worked for me....

06IXMR
03-17-2007, 08:00 PM
you know a lot about that huh lol.

Evo442
03-17-2007, 09:18 PM
Might not be a bad idea to get her side of things before ending a 2 year relationship...

hot8evosgirl
03-18-2007, 02:23 AM
yeah...been there done that.......

Lurk
03-18-2007, 06:08 PM
You should dip her tampons in broken glass. :D

craziazzmofo66
03-18-2007, 11:13 PM
You should dip her tampons in broken glass. :D


o thats evil.......

crctslt
03-19-2007, 12:16 AM
Ok assuming it is true you can:

A) Just leave

B) Pick her up from the airport after she visits the mystery man. On the way home drop her off in the boondocks

C) Pick her up from the airport after she visits the mystery man. On the way home drop her off in the boondocks but keep her pants.

Me, I'd just stop talking to her.

Boostd4
03-19-2007, 02:53 PM
Ok Guys and Kimmie....

It's been a week or so since the confrontation (I feel like the host of cheaters)...

So she basically denied the whole thing. I even showed her the email with her email string in it...she denied it. I asked her to open up her email to prove to me that she didn't write the emails. "See, there is nothing there!" Uhhh...click your SENT box...

Whoops...guess she doesn't know how to use email very well.

So yeah, she lied to my face and got caught by her own stupidity. She's been begging me for a second chance and telling me that she was just being "overly friendly" with this other dude. She told me that the reason why she lied to me was because she was scared how I would react. Interesting concept...

So anyway...its been about a week and a half...I've accumulated about 67 missed calls, 50 voicemails and about 90 text messages. I've had 1 campout on my front porch (that was funny)...1 Set of new speakers for my PC (the good Klipsch ones) which I kept, hey how do I know SHE left them there? So its pretty obvious that she knows she screwed up.

I'm not going to lie...its been tough because I have spent 2 years of my life with this woman. I have my moments of weakness and think that maybe I should give it a 2nd shot...

Maybe if I find a 52" LCD on my front porch...I can find it in my heart to give her a chance.

Limeyboy
03-19-2007, 02:57 PM
Dude.. im surpsed she even let you look in her email. she musta been so confident she deleted it all. Im sorry to hear about all that, but to be frank you are better off without her. 2 years not wasted, but 2 years spent educating yourself a bit more.

missred
03-19-2007, 02:59 PM
Maybe if I find a 52" LCD on my front porch...I can find it in my heart to give her a chance.


Sorry to hear this Mike, I'm glad that you still have your sense of humor I think we all need to kick it again and have a huge group hug. Hey Mike why dont you come out to the TPR event and see some new and old faces this maybe another way to release some stress broda. If ya come I'll look for ya mang.

Boostd4
03-19-2007, 03:10 PM
Dude.. im surpsed she even let you look in her email. she musta been so confident she deleted it all. Im sorry to hear about all that, but to be frank you are better off without her. 2 years not wasted, but 2 years spent educating yourself a bit more.


Yeah, she isn't very savvy when it comes to the interweb. I kinda look at it the same way, 2 years of education...although the lesson came right smack dab at the end of the 2 years.

Boostd4
03-19-2007, 03:11 PM
Maybe if I find a 52" LCD on my front porch...I can find it in my heart to give her a chance.


Sorry to hear this Mike, I'm glad that you still have your sense of humor I think we all need to kick it again and have a huge group hug. Hey Mike why dont you come out to the TPR event and see some new and old faces this maybe another way to release some stress broda. If ya come I'll look for ya mang.


Man...its been awhile hasn't it? Yeah I'm going to make it out to more meets and stuff now...just been so busy lately.

awdaddict
03-19-2007, 03:14 PM
Maybe if I find a 52" LCD on my front porch...I can find it in my heart to give her a chance.


Sorry to hear this Mike, I'm glad that you still have your sense of humor I think we all need to kick it again and have a huge group hug. Hey Mike why dont you come out to the TPR event and see some new and old faces this maybe another way to release some stress broda. If ya come I'll look for ya mang.


You can line up in the front... and all 90+ of us on the list could give you a hug 1 by 1 :)

missred
03-19-2007, 03:17 PM
Maybe if I find a 52" LCD on my front porch...I can find it in my heart to give her a chance.


Sorry to hear this Mike, I'm glad that you still have your sense of humor I think we all need to kick it again and have a huge group hug. Hey Mike why dont you come out to the TPR event and see some new and old faces this maybe another way to release some stress broda. If ya come I'll look for ya mang.


You can line up in the front... and all 90+ of us on the list could give you a hug 1 by 1 :)


Rob voluteers to go first and give you more than a hug after :lol:

awdaddict
03-19-2007, 03:21 PM
uh yea, I'll buy you a drink.
Paul would do much more than that afterwards.

OMGish Paul... stop treating me like I'm Jay!

06IXMR
03-19-2007, 06:12 PM
uh yea, I'll buy you a drink.
Paul would do much more than that afterwards.

OMGish Paul... stop treating me like I'm Jay!


Your funny, I'll treat you like my chipindale dancer.

Boostd4
03-19-2007, 06:38 PM
uh yea, I'll buy you a drink.
Paul would do much more than that afterwards.

OMGish Paul... stop treating me like I'm Jay!


Guys guys! There is more than enough of me to go around...you'll all get your turn.

MadEvo
03-19-2007, 07:09 PM
uh yea, I'll buy you a drink.
Paul would do much more than that afterwards.

OMGish Paul... stop treating me like I'm Jay!


Your funny, I'll treat you like my chipindale dancer.


bwahahahaha..

awdaddict
03-20-2007, 12:28 AM
uh yea, I'll buy you a drink.
Paul would do much more than that afterwards.

OMGish Paul... stop treating me like I'm Jay!


Your funny, I'll treat you like my chipindale dancer.



http://www.cs.tut.fi/~turunenk/WTF.bmp

RgistRdShowoffIX
03-20-2007, 01:10 AM
mwahahahaha that's great!!! ^

RgistRdShowoffIX
03-20-2007, 01:14 AM
Maybe if I find a 52" LCD on my front porch...I can find it in my heart to give her a chance.


Sorry to hear this Mike, I'm glad that you still have your sense of humor I think we all need to kick it again and have a huge group hug. Hey Mike why dont you come out to the TPR event and see some new and old faces this maybe another way to release some stress broda. If ya come I'll look for ya mang.


You can line up in the front... and all 90+ of us on the list could give you a hug 1 by 1 :)


Rob voluteers to go first and give you more than a hug after :lol:


omg mod pwnzors! hahahaah

sorry rob that's just too funny not to laugh.

:lol:

player67
03-20-2007, 11:22 AM
There is absolutely no F****** tolerance for this BS. This happened to me in high school (now do think just cuz it was in high school it was a serious relationship), and man oh man. The last 2 months of the relationship was long distance because she moved to sacramento and im in danville. And once she found out that I knew, she was too scared to confront me ever since. As for the guy, no one tells me his name or where he lives because hes too scared and his pussy friends were to scared to tell me. So, pretty fucked up shit, scarred me for a couple months but I sat on it. Not worth being sad over a girl for a REALLY long time. Anyways, good luck to you, I think you should confornt realy hard and make her cry every tear of sorrow she should shed because of her unfaithulness. And make it dramatic, not for you, but for her. Scar her as she has scarred you. Peace.

dizhungryguy
03-20-2007, 11:39 AM
Thats some F****** up SH**!..... What can you do she wanted to try something else!..THe best revenge will be go post some nekkid pics of her on ex's revenge or something like that online!..
Just go out and have fun! there's alot of girls out there man.. i THink most of us here miss being single.

PANGES
03-20-2007, 08:02 PM
Thats some F****** up SH**!..... What can you do she wanted to try something else!..THe best revenge will be go post some nekkid pics of her on ex's revenge or something like that online!..
Just go out and have fun! there's alot of girls out there man.. i THink most of us here miss being single.


You just want to see the pictures.... Shame on you. :lol:

player67
03-22-2007, 12:24 AM
Thats some F****** up SH**!..... What can you do she wanted to try something else!..THe best revenge will be go post some nekkid pics of her on ex's revenge or something like that online!..
Just go out and have fun! there's alot of girls out there man.. i THink most of us here miss being single.


You just want to see the pictures.... Shame on you. :lol:




:lol:

PANGES
03-23-2007, 08:42 PM
Thats some F****** up SH**!..... What can you do she wanted to try something else!..THe best revenge will be go post some nekkid pics of her on ex's revenge or something like that online!..
Just go out and have fun! there's alot of girls out there man.. i THink most of us here miss being single.


You just want to see the pictures.... Shame on you. :lol:




:lol:


You too huh?

onesicklambo
03-23-2007, 10:15 PM
I woulda called CHRIS HANSON out to handle this hahah