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Thread: To catch a cheater....

  1. #1

    Default To catch a cheater....

    Ok boys (and possibly girls)...I've got an interesting situation for you. I know there are some creative people on this board...and quite honestly some evil ones :shock:. But I've got a situation with my current GF that I was hoping you all would offer up some suggestions for.

    I've been seeing this girl for 2 years (as of a few days ago in fact) and we had a "break" for about a month back in Sept. of last year. It really wasn't much of a break because we were still seeing each other regularly...but I digress. So during this "break" she went to Vegas for a wedding and met one of the wedding attendees and apparently hit it off. I didn't see this as a problem as we supposedly fixed things and we were moving on.

    A few days after we patched things up, I get this long message through myspace about how she was super desperate to get back together with me and how she was planning to get knocked up to stay with me. It came from an anonymous profile that hasn't been active since last year. I pretty much bushed it off as BS and moved on.

    Fast forward to this morning. I get an extremely long email from an address I've never seen. The subject line reads " **** is cheating". Basically the email has a string of copied emails (I'm assuming from ****'s account) detailing the back and forth between my GF and this guy she met. They are talking about phone conversations and text messages they have had and the dates on the emails lead up until last night (Mar. 12). There are several points in the emails in which she expresses her desire to fly out and see him, he lives in AZ. It's pretty obvious she shared secrets with the wrong people.

    Now, here is an interesting twist...apparently he is in Iraq training police officers for the next year. But, he has leave to come home from time to time. In her very last email last night she expressed to him that she'd like to see him when he comes home...riiiight.


    So my friends...I am left with no other alternative than to obviously confront her about it and basically end things. I have zero tolerance for this type of stuff and I'll never be able to trust her again.

    My question to you is...what can I do to make myself feel better about doing this. I don't want to be over the top evil...but I want her to know she f'ed up.

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  2. #2

    Default Re: To catch a cheater....

    That sucks. I say just drop her a$$ and just let it go at that. Be the better person and just walk away she will eventually realize that she lost something good. You'll find a better girl before you know it.

  3. #3

    Default Re: To catch a cheater....

    I understand the question you are asking. I too had a similar situation about 6 years ago. My bf at the time started cheating on me with a girl at his work, and I had to figure out a way to let him know that I knew what he was doing, without being too vindictive about it. My dad is a PI, so I guess I have it in my blood, but I did a little investigative work and caught him in Monterey at the hotel room with the girl. Threw him for a total curve ball when I knocked on the door.
    Anyways, since you already know what's going on, I suggest just sitting down and letting her know that you know, that you have proof, tell her how you are feeling and that she can have him. Be calm, be the bigger person (you already are because of your fidelity) and be in control of the conversation. Once there is all that needs to be said, just walk away. You'll feel much better doing it this way, rather than getting into a huge yelling match and calling each other names.
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  4. #4

    Default Re: To catch a cheater....

    Oh yeah, and good luck! Let us know what happens once you confront her.
    You deserve to be with someone that only wants to be with you. And remeber, this isn't your fault. She's the one with the problem. I'm a big believer in Karma, so she will get what's coming to her.
    Please donate to the &quot;Help Kimmie buy an Evo fund&quot; Lolz!<br /><br />Coming soon possibly...another Evo! I can&#039;t shake the evo disease!<br /><br />

  5. #5
    Join Date
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    Default Re: To catch a cheater....

    ^ +1

    She's already acted very immature so be the better person and be mature. This'll make her feel low and don't take sorry cus she prolly sorry she was caught.

    Sorry, man. This situation sucks. :?
    -Ryan
    WW Lancer Evolution IX

  6. Default Re: To catch a cheater....

    good: im sorry to hear what has happened. best of luck getting things fixed. hopefully leaving her is the main option you can accept.

    evil: make sure she gets knocked up, and when she tells you shes pregnant, you say you want to leave her. then she'll cry about you leaving her and the kid. then you can get a dna test and slam in her face that the kid isnt yours and that she's been cheating. (slightly different from the other story about the guy with the vasectomy)
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  7. #7

    Default Re: To catch a cheater....

    There is no point in lowering yourself to a level that you will later regret. Forward her the emails and ask her to pick up her stuff, if there is any there. I have had the exact same experience, I just picked up my stuff while she was at work, printed out what I had found and took off. It is not worth your time , energy or a possible compromise of your integrity to confront a person too scared to speak the truth.
    I am sorry for your troubles but men have few choices and they are usually hard ones.

    Sammy

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
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    6,265

    Default Re: To catch a cheater....

    Do it with a normal heart.
    That means, don't be angry, don't be sad.
    Be like the calm water... and afterward don't think about it.
    Don't think whether you could of done something better or something along that line.
    When it's done, it's done.
    - Rob

    WLD a.k.a. Wilson LOL Disease - there's currently no cure for this.

    Learn from your mistake: Start off with spin-outs then power slides.

  9. #9

    Default Re: To catch a cheater....

    Just say good bye to her my friend.. its the only way. Thats a hard position, but this situation is a major slap in your face. Considering all is true, your never going to trust this girl in the future, and you will end up not being yourself slipping into a controlling nature... it will end anyway once this sort of mis trust is present.

    You have an advantage in that you have the facts in front of you so like suggested above, show no emotion..

  10. #10

    Default Re: To catch a cheater....

    Thanks for the input everyone...I'm basically going to handle this as calmly as possible.

    My strategy is to not even mention the emails...but just his name...and I'll let her dig the hole herself.
    2008 WW Evo X GSR SSS - GReddy Ti-C Cat-back-Work XT7 18x9.5 +20 -Nisei Engineering Matte Black UICP - Works Shifter Bushings-Works Ride Springs-K&N Drop In -GST Boost Pill

    Digitally Remastered by Bryan@GST
    Current Powah: 305 whp/305wtq on GST Dyno.
    www.gstmotorsports.com

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