Ok guys, I am just trying to figure out whats wrong with me. I can't seem to find a girl that likes me for me or anything like that. I am 20. have no game to save my life. Im more of the "Nice Guy". What to do, What to do...........
Ok guys, I am just trying to figure out whats wrong with me. I can't seem to find a girl that likes me for me or anything like that. I am 20. have no game to save my life. Im more of the "Nice Guy". What to do, What to do...........
JDM*Dynasty from the 510->415->650
stop trying so hard
Artist formerly known as John
1992 Galant VR4
2008 Mazdaspeed3
RIP 2006 GG Evolution IX SSL - Fubar'd by GST
RIP 2005 EB Evolution VIII SSL - flipped, totalled
+1Originally Posted by John
i used to be the "nice guy" girls dont go for it. its a sign that youre desperate and weak.
400whp/384tq - E85 - stock turbo
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gauging from his age,Originally Posted by ChuckP
high school/college?
400whp/384tq - E85 - stock turbo
334whp/317tq - 91oct - stock turbo
Sponsored by www.speedelement.com / www.rallyinnovations.com / www.bajadesigns.com / www.sportsracingfuel.com / www.gruppe-s.com / www.vexmotorsports.com / www.detailaddict.com
Tuned by Bryan@GST Motorsports
Proud supporter of www.gstmotorsports.com / www.xperformance.com
^^^ school, work, through other friends........
JDM*Dynasty from the 510->415->650
Well, this might not make you feel a lot better but...
I'm a nice guy too. (If I were dabaysevo, this is where i hit on you.) I didn't ever really get "game" as I can't play the games that seem to be the norm in the dating/party scene. But now fifteen years of being a nice guy is paying off: I have a bunch of friends who are girls, and they are all about the matchmaking now that I'm over thirty. (This weekend was spent with a friends ex gf partying at a penthouse in SF.)
So my advice: Keep it up, you'll start getting laid in ten years for sure!
(I have more advice, will make another post.)
Sorry for pasting this whole thing, but I lost the source.
FLIRTING: HOW TO DO IT
1. DO initiate flirtation with people of roughly the same level of attractiveness as yourself.
This will give you the best chance of compatability. Most successful marriages and long-term relationships are between partners of more or less equal good looks. There is some leeway, of course, and other qualities are also important, but statistically, relationships where one partner is much more attractive than the other tend to be less successful. Studies have shown that the more evenly matched partners are in their attractiveness, the more likely they are to stay together.
But evaluating your own attractiveness may be difficult. Research has shown that many women have a poor body-image, and often underestimate their attractiveness. Some recent studies indicate, for example, that up to 80% of adult women believe that they are too fat, and try to achieve a figure that is around two sizes smaller than the body-size men find most desirable. If you are female, the odds are that you are more attractive than you think, so try flirting with some better-looking men.
Men generally tend to be less critical of their own physical appearance than women. This is partly because standards of beauty for males are much less rigid than for females, and a wider variety of shapes and features are considered attractive. But it must be said that some men are also inclined to overestimate their attractiveness. If you are a more honest male, and do not consider yourself good-looking, remember that most men lack expertise in the subtleties of social interaction, so polishing up your flirting skills could give you the edge over a more attractive rival.
2. Don't flirt with people who are unlikely to return your interest.
Even if you are not looking for a long-term mate, you will enjoy flirting more with someone who is interested in you. So it makes sense to approach people who are likely to see you as at least a possible partner, rather than those likely to dismiss you as unsuitable.
Evolution has favoured males who select young, attractive mates and females who select partners with power, wealth and status. Men therefore naturally tend to seek women who are younger than them and place greater emphasis on physical beauty, while women are more likely to favour older males with higher status and earning potential. Women also tend to prefer men who are taller than them. Analysis of thousands of personal ads – where people are more explicit about their requirements, and more obviously conscious of the requirements of others – shows that these are the qualities most frequently demanded and offered by mate-seekers.
Short, low-status males and older, less attractive females may therefore be a bit more restricted in their choice of potential partners, although there are many exceptions to this rule, and confidence and charm can outweigh apparent disadvantages.
In the How to Flirt section, you will find tips on how to tell immediately, even from across a crowded room, whether someone is likely to return your interest or not.
How to flirt
The first key to successful flirting is not an ability to show off and impress, but the knack of conveying that you like someone. If your 'target' knows that you find him or her interesting and attractive, he or she will be more inclined to like you.
Although this simple fact has been demonstrated in countless studies and experiments, you don't really need scientists to prove it. You already know that when you are told someone fancies you, or hear that someone has praised or admired you, your interest in that person automatically increases – even if it is someone you have never met!
Conveying that you like someone, and judging whether or not the attraction is mutual, clearly involves a combination of verbal and non-verbal communication skills.
When asked about flirting, most people – particularly men – focus on the verbal element: the 'chatting-up', the problems of knowing what to say, finding the right words, etc. In fact, the non-verbal element – body-language, tone of voice, etc. – is much more important, particularly in the initial stages of a flirtation.
When you first meet new people, their initial impression of you will be based 55% on your appearance and body-language, 38% on your style of speaking and only 7% on what you actually say.
Also, their non-verbal signals will tell you much more about their feelings towards you than the words they use. We show attitudes such as liking and disliking not by what we say but by the way we say it and the posture, gestures and expressions that accompany our speech.
The customary polite greeting "pleased to meet you", for example, can convey anything from 'I find you really attractive' to 'I am not the slightest bit interested in you', depending on the tone of voice, facial expression, position and posture of the speaker.
Non-verbal flirting
When a man and a woman meet for the first time, both are in a difficult, ambiguous and potentially risky situation. Neither person knows what the other's intentions and feelings are. Because stating intentions and feelings verbally involves a high risk of embarrassment or possible rejection, non-verbal behaviour becomes the main channel of communication. Unlike the spoken word, body language can signal invitation, acceptance or refusal without being too obvious, without causing offence or making binding commitments.
Warning: some of the non-verbal flirting techniques outlined in this section are very powerful signals, and should be used with caution. Women should be particularly careful when using signals of interest and attraction. Men already tend to mistake friendliness for flirting; if your signals of interest are too direct and obvious, they will mistake them for sexual availability.